Is time for it to change

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i have enough of ppl wan challenge mi for being the best....
wan step on top of mi and be the "light"...
is everywhere i go...

i admit i am a person who will fight for the best if i can...
if tat really happen, it is bad for mi...
cus i will nv admit failure or even defeat..
like if u ask mi smth, if i did not do the best, i will lie or not say anything...
this is wat i did in the past...
and i heard before this saying, "if u lie once, u will nd more lies to cover it"...
but i noe it will be found out in the end...
Wen u were in high place, but wen u fall.. it really hurts..

Starting from now, i going to put an end to it...
u wan come challenge mi, i will treat u like no 1...
wan become 1st/best, go lo, i will not stop u or even fight with u anymore..
i am alr tired of being 1st and ppl doing smth behind my back...
spread rumors abt mi which is not even true...


*In sch-->>
ZT, i noe we have a agreement of having best result...
but i will no longer have this kind of mindset le...
i am tired of worrying result being bad in sch...
i am tired of fighting anymore thanks to "some ppl"...
from now on, i wan be back to normal human being without any burden...
以平常心对待所有的事，无论好或坏，我都会接受。。。
i dun mind telling u i believe i did not do well for my EG2121 as it did not meet my expectation, even though i am confirm pass with quite high marks...
Cus of my over-confident, i make a careless mistake....
maybe some of u will be very happy to hear this, but i will not care abt it anymore...
To mi now, nth is more important den mi being happy le...
i will not accept any challenges anymore, i will jus treat everything as a normal exam to mi..
maybe by doing this, i will be stress free...
i sry for mi wanting to change...
i have enough of challenging...
but i can promise i will still do all my best in watever i do...
and dun worry is, i will still maintain my standard...

* At work
Those ppl who wan test my limit, u can now forget abt it le...
cus i will not give a damn anymore...
i will not care anymore...
i will go back to the mi i 1st day work..
will not get angry or even have black face...
cus i finally realised by doing this, the only person who is suffering is mi!!!
but i will still fight for the right if i being accused, this is wat i will nv change...
i believe u will be cheering inside ur heart if i do this..
If u dun wan to teach mi or even let mi noe more, tat is fine with mi le...
i can always ask another person or learn by myself...
u wan ppl to listen or respect u by shouting at mi, pls go ahead and do somemore..
cus u hav try before, but did it work in the end??
Beside getting scold from mi, ppl there also end up siding mi or will come console mi instead of u...
for everything u do, can pls use ur brain to think...
how long i been working compare to how long u been working???
ppl noe u or mi better...
u wan go sucks up boss, pls go ahead without pulling mi down ok...
stop using mi as a bait by showing how well u treat mi wen u are acting...
den if i nv talk to u, i become the bad guy...
if wat u wan is being promoted to much higher position, pls go ahead...
i will nv snatch with u, cus i not even interested...
And i believe if i have interest in the position, do u really think u have a chance??

I remember the 1st day i get promoted, i really have an interest of learning alot of new things...
but right now, i have no more interest le lo..
i sometime feel tat i have let alot of ppl down cus they helped mi alot through the process...
until who i am today...
but wat to do??
nth lo...
waiting for 1 day i really really tender my resignation letter...

i couldn't bear to leave LCT..
i have alot of fond memories there...
alot of very very good friends there..
5+ year to almost 6 years le, is not easy to pass sometime...
though i very fierce sometime, but it is all for ur own good...
at least will not get scold from boss for nth..
but the situation now tell mi, some ppl can't wait to get rid of mi...
i believe is time to leave...
is time to go out try new things le...
is time to let some 1 else appreciate mi...
or maybe i should even listen to my god sis, transfer other store, and start afresh...

i try different job in between wen still holding on to MAC, they offer better pay or even being treated well...
but i ended up quiting tat side and wen back to MAC, cus friends asking mi to stay...
cus i listen to them sometime of bad things abt store, sometime find solution to save them..
Alot are very close to mi...
but come to think of it, sometime i think i was soo stupid...
should choose to stay at the other side, rather then come back and make myself suffer sometime from some mental disorder person...
lol...
cannot turn back le, wat past mean pass le...

i think this is the 1st time i wrote soo long in 1 post ba, maybe is becos i been keeping in myself for too long...